The Weblog of Sir Ian Bowler, MP

MP for Buckland & Ruttington, devoted father, enthusiastic belcher

Good news!

Delighted to announce that I have been made Minister For Prisons in today’s reshuffle. Be sure to tell me what you all want to see there, when you are all, inevitably, rounded up and incaracerated…

Sir Ian Bowler reveals the 12th Doctor LIVE! (a while ago)

Michael Gove: A Poem

English: Michael Gove speaking at the Conserva...

English: Michael Gove speaking at the Conservative Party “Big Society” policy launch (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Michael, Michael, Michael Gove!
Your clothes from the rent hair of teachers are wove.
Into your limpid eyes I dove,
Like the crystal waters of a seaside cove.
Your cheeks are red.
Your lips are mauve.
Your thighs are firm.
Your hooves are clove.

Michael! Michael! Michael! Michael!
You look like part of a frog’s like cycle.
Every man on a bus or bike’ll
Kneel at the name of Gove comma Michael.

(TO BE SHOUTED UNTIL HOARSE)

Speak To Your Member #4: After The Funeral

Speak To Your Member #3 – Thatcher Edition

I react to the sad news…

Speak To Your Member #2

Yes, this is my normal voice. You caaaahnts.

I am back. Speak To Me!

I will now be taking questions. Internet, do your worst.

My response to Leveson

In Which I Apologise To A Pleb

Like the time I called that nurse a ‘fat-faced ultradivvy’.

In Honour Of The Paralympics I Shall Be Getting Legless All Month


What you’ve all got to realise is that we’re all a bit disabled. I’m innumerate. But we all have to chip in. It takes three to tango.

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